There's no doubt that men aren't doing so well in America these days.
Boys are medicated at vastly larger rates than their female counterparts and are continually outperformed in schools. This continues past high school- males now account for just over 40% of college graduates.
Many of our younger men are having trouble growing up. They are experiencing difficulty in accomplishing the previous generations' marks of manhood- financial independence, marriage, fatherhood, and career.
Many of our middle-aged men have failed in the areas of husband and father. This is seen in the increasingly popular term "baby daddy."
One of the reasons for this is simple selfishness. Yes, there are many men out there who are just flat-out selfish. They want what they want, with no commitments or sacrifice or cost or perseverance, and once they get what they want, they're gone. This might explain some of the problems with guys. However, I think there is something bigger at play.
Men are simply confused. We really don't know what it is we are supposed to be doing.
An increasing number of men have never had an example of a man to follow. Many grown men have been raised by women, women, and more women. They were raised by a single mother, who then took them to daycare with female workers. Then they went to public school with an overwhelming majority of female teachers. Maybe a music teacher or gym teacher was male, but that was about it. Couple that with the fact that they go over to their friends' houses, all of whom live without a dad in the home- is it any wonder that our boys are growing into men without any idea of what it means to be a man?
Men learn by example. We learn by observation. When there is no example, there is no learning. Single mothers can do their best, and many of them do, to raise their sons, but they can't do everything the boy needs.
To make this confusion worse, so much of what previous generations have considered "masculine" are simply laughed at and mocked in today's contemporary culture. Men are portrayed in media as confused buffoons, needing their wise and all-knowing wives and female counterparts to straighten them out at every turn. I believe this has been bad for both men and women.
I believe that the solution to this crisis of manhood is to go back to the beginning- back to the dawn of creation when men and women were created. What was the man created to do?
Why was the man created to be physically stronger than the female? This isn't being sexist- this is reality. Men WERE created to be physically stronger. The question is: why? Why were men created with an innate sense of risk and adventure? Why were men created to be less emotional and more objective? This was not a mistake, and this is not belittling to females. Men ARE different, and I think it's time we stop trashing and belittling these things, or worse, seeing them as dangerous (something to be controlled and medicated out of existence), and start realizing these are wonderful gifts men can bring to the family and to a society.
I believe the reason men were created the way they were is summed up in one word: PROTECTOR. That's why men were created the way they were. I believe a man is at his best when he is a protector. Men were created physically stronger, desiring risk and adventure, because God gave him his role to protect and provide for his family.
Men are at their absolute best when they take the role of protector seriously. What woman wouldn't give anything to have a man who loves her enough that he would give his life to keep her safe? What child wouldn't want a strong father to keep him or her safe day in and day out, year after year?
I don't believe that this role is an accident. I believe that God placed me on this earth for many reasons- to lead people to Christ, to be a church planter/pastor/missionary, to leave this world better than I found it, etc. However, my primary role on this earth is to care for and protect the four people God has given me in the form of my family- my wife and three children. I am to ensure that they are physically safe, physically provided for, and in need of nothing.
However, I am also to ensure that they are emotionally safe. I am here to ensure that they know what love truly is. I am here to ensure that they know who God is and what His plans are for them. I am at my best as a man when I take my role as protector seriously.
Does this mean that I hover over every aspect of their lives like a bodyguard? Sometimes. But not very often. The young and the weak need protection more than the strong, so at certain times I will have to be "a bodyguard." However, the goal of parenthood is to train our children for adulthood- to prepare them for independence. This is the ultimate way of protecting them- to ensure that they have the life skills to stand on their own two feet, to be strong and independent, to be able to take life's challenges head-on and conquer them, to be able to take disappointment and keep going, and to always remember that faith is the key to it all.
I believe this society would be far better served with men who take their role as protector seriously. When this happens, it changes everything. A man cannot be self-centered and be a protector at the same time. A self-centered man is concerned about only himself; a protector is concerned about others. Seeing yourself as a protector, men, changes the entire way we view our time, our money, our energy, our free time, our words, and our priorities. It changes the decisions we make, the words we say, and the way we run our lives.
How different would this world be if we had fewer self-centered men?
Men, we are at our very best when we are in our role as protector. Our wives and children need that from us. Our society needs it from us. Our churches need that from us.
The most important thing, however, is that is brings us closer to the image in which we were made. We were made in the image of God. We were made strong, brave, and adventurous with a desire for sacrifice and duty. That's the way men were created. That's what our families need- for us to be strong, brave, adventurous, and to take seriously the sacrifices and duties that come with leading a family. We were made in the image of God- let's start leading our families like we know it.
Boys are medicated at vastly larger rates than their female counterparts and are continually outperformed in schools. This continues past high school- males now account for just over 40% of college graduates.
Many of our younger men are having trouble growing up. They are experiencing difficulty in accomplishing the previous generations' marks of manhood- financial independence, marriage, fatherhood, and career.
Many of our middle-aged men have failed in the areas of husband and father. This is seen in the increasingly popular term "baby daddy."
One of the reasons for this is simple selfishness. Yes, there are many men out there who are just flat-out selfish. They want what they want, with no commitments or sacrifice or cost or perseverance, and once they get what they want, they're gone. This might explain some of the problems with guys. However, I think there is something bigger at play.
Men are simply confused. We really don't know what it is we are supposed to be doing.
An increasing number of men have never had an example of a man to follow. Many grown men have been raised by women, women, and more women. They were raised by a single mother, who then took them to daycare with female workers. Then they went to public school with an overwhelming majority of female teachers. Maybe a music teacher or gym teacher was male, but that was about it. Couple that with the fact that they go over to their friends' houses, all of whom live without a dad in the home- is it any wonder that our boys are growing into men without any idea of what it means to be a man?
Men learn by example. We learn by observation. When there is no example, there is no learning. Single mothers can do their best, and many of them do, to raise their sons, but they can't do everything the boy needs.
To make this confusion worse, so much of what previous generations have considered "masculine" are simply laughed at and mocked in today's contemporary culture. Men are portrayed in media as confused buffoons, needing their wise and all-knowing wives and female counterparts to straighten them out at every turn. I believe this has been bad for both men and women.
I believe that the solution to this crisis of manhood is to go back to the beginning- back to the dawn of creation when men and women were created. What was the man created to do?
Why was the man created to be physically stronger than the female? This isn't being sexist- this is reality. Men WERE created to be physically stronger. The question is: why? Why were men created with an innate sense of risk and adventure? Why were men created to be less emotional and more objective? This was not a mistake, and this is not belittling to females. Men ARE different, and I think it's time we stop trashing and belittling these things, or worse, seeing them as dangerous (something to be controlled and medicated out of existence), and start realizing these are wonderful gifts men can bring to the family and to a society.
I believe the reason men were created the way they were is summed up in one word: PROTECTOR. That's why men were created the way they were. I believe a man is at his best when he is a protector. Men were created physically stronger, desiring risk and adventure, because God gave him his role to protect and provide for his family.
Men are at their absolute best when they take the role of protector seriously. What woman wouldn't give anything to have a man who loves her enough that he would give his life to keep her safe? What child wouldn't want a strong father to keep him or her safe day in and day out, year after year?
I don't believe that this role is an accident. I believe that God placed me on this earth for many reasons- to lead people to Christ, to be a church planter/pastor/missionary, to leave this world better than I found it, etc. However, my primary role on this earth is to care for and protect the four people God has given me in the form of my family- my wife and three children. I am to ensure that they are physically safe, physically provided for, and in need of nothing.
However, I am also to ensure that they are emotionally safe. I am here to ensure that they know what love truly is. I am here to ensure that they know who God is and what His plans are for them. I am at my best as a man when I take my role as protector seriously.
Does this mean that I hover over every aspect of their lives like a bodyguard? Sometimes. But not very often. The young and the weak need protection more than the strong, so at certain times I will have to be "a bodyguard." However, the goal of parenthood is to train our children for adulthood- to prepare them for independence. This is the ultimate way of protecting them- to ensure that they have the life skills to stand on their own two feet, to be strong and independent, to be able to take life's challenges head-on and conquer them, to be able to take disappointment and keep going, and to always remember that faith is the key to it all.
I believe this society would be far better served with men who take their role as protector seriously. When this happens, it changes everything. A man cannot be self-centered and be a protector at the same time. A self-centered man is concerned about only himself; a protector is concerned about others. Seeing yourself as a protector, men, changes the entire way we view our time, our money, our energy, our free time, our words, and our priorities. It changes the decisions we make, the words we say, and the way we run our lives.
How different would this world be if we had fewer self-centered men?
Men, we are at our very best when we are in our role as protector. Our wives and children need that from us. Our society needs it from us. Our churches need that from us.
The most important thing, however, is that is brings us closer to the image in which we were made. We were made in the image of God. We were made strong, brave, and adventurous with a desire for sacrifice and duty. That's the way men were created. That's what our families need- for us to be strong, brave, adventurous, and to take seriously the sacrifices and duties that come with leading a family. We were made in the image of God- let's start leading our families like we know it.
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