Attitude is essential. It governs all things, decides all things, measures all things. It will literally determine if you are joyful or sad, grateful or bitter, excited or depressed. It will determine whether you are fun to be around or if you are to be avoided at all costs. It will determine marital satisfaction, financial situation, relationship status, job satisfaction status, and just about everything else in life.
It will even determine your feelings towards God and the church.
If you follow these four steps, you will be amazed at how quickly your life will change- simply because you have changed your attitude.
Remember: a bad attitude is like a flat tire. You can't go anywhere until you change it.
Step 1: Realize that you always see everything you WANT to see.
Jim went to church. During the prelude, he heard the organist miss a note and he winced. During the time where the congregation was supposed to kneel in prayer, he heard a teenager talking and he got his feathers ruffled. During the offering, he thought he saw an usher checking out what he put in the plate, and it made his blood boil. During the sermon, he heard the pastor make five grammatical mistakes. As he was leaving, he said, "What a bunch of incompetent morons and hypocrites! I'm never going there again!"
Don also went to church. During the prelude, he was amazed at the majesty of the organist playing "A Mighty Fortress is Our God." During the time of prayer, he heard a teenager sharing her testimony with an older woman sitting next to her. He was pleased to see Christians giving sacrificially to meet community needs during the offering. The sermon answered a question he had been asking for a long time. As he left, he said, "How can someone come in here and not experience the power and majesty of God?"
The interesting part? Both men attended the same church service. Both saw exactly what they wanted to see.
How about you? If you are looking for reasons that life is awful, you're certain to find them. If you are looking for reasons to see that things are great, you will find them too. Just realize that in life, you are seeing exactly what you want to see, and your attitude is allowing you to see things that are good or things that are awful.
Step 2: Establish wide margins regarding toxic people.
Some people are toxic. Sometimes you can get rid of them- you can unfriend them on Facebook, refuse to hang out with them, etc. Other times, you can't get rid of them- you share the same house, office, school, etc with them. If you can't get away from them, set up boundaries between you and them, allowing them little to no influence on you, because they will certainly kill your attitude. The five types of toxic people (that I can identify in the Bible) are:
1) The Perpetual Victim. This is the person whose actions have completely destroyed his or her life, and yet continues to blame everyone but himself. He dates the wrong person, gets his heart broken, blames God (or others) and then next week does the same thing. He spends money like a drunken sailor and then blames "the system" or "the man" for his poverty. He never sees anything as his own fault and is constantly making excuses. Establish wide boundaries around this kind of person, because his self-destruction is coming fast.
2) The Ventilator. This is the person who shows his annoyance at anything and everything. He flies off the handle at the slightest thing. He has no gravity, no maturity, and enjoys spouting his opinions; moving into belligerent territory when his opinion is crossed. This person never stops to consider his words or his tone, and rarely if ever lets something go or drops the matter. Drama doesn't just follow this person; it literally inhabits him. Establish wide boundaries around this kind of person, because you will become like him if you don't.
3) The Black Hole. This is the person who has the ability to suck the life, joy, and happiness out of any person within a four-hundred yard radius. They constantly point out what is wrong with each and every situation, focusing on the hopelessness of life. They are needy, whiny, and overly dramatic people. Eeyore looks cheerful compared to these people. They tend to criticize anything that seems good, explaining how awful it probably is. However, the worst thing that The Black Hole person does is to criticize dreams, visions, and goals of others, trying to defeat them before they start. If you see this person coming towards you, run.
4) The Mocker/Scoffer. Perhaps the most toxic of all people you will ever encounter is the Mocker/Scoffer. This is a person who is incredibly insecure who tries to pass himself off as intelligent and bright by mocking others. They scoff at anything they disagree with, descending into personal attacks on character. They try to pass themselves off as experts, but in the end, all they do is destroy. They are excellent at insults, gloating, making fun, and stabbing in the back. If you have one of these people in your life, move as far away from them as you can, because they are perhaps the most toxic person of all. They will literally kill your attitude.
5) The Busybody. This is the person with no concept of boundaries at all. They see no difference between your business and their business, and they constantly involve themselves in things that are none of their concern. These are the gossips of the town. Interesting enough, these people are usually tired, exhausted, and stressed, because involving themselves in others' lives wears them out. They are constantly finding out information and slanting it to make it the best story possible. Always remember the golden rule of gossiping: Whoever is gossiping TO you is also gossiping ABOUT you, so keep a wide boundary between you and them.
Step 3. Lose the entitlement mentality.
Nothing kills your attitude faster than the feeling that you aren't getting something you deserve.
I was in youth ministry many years ago, and a high school girl in our ministry came up to me to talk.
She said, "I'm not happy." Big surprise. This girl was NEVER happy.
She continued, "These are supposed to be the best years of my life, and I'm just miserable."
I asked her, "What are you doing to make these the best years of your life?" She looked stunned. She apparently thought that once you were in high school, people lined up to make your day for you. I continued, "You're miserable because you think life owes you something. News flash- life owes you NOTHING."
"You've been given an amazing gift called life. You want these to be the best years of your life? Go out and MAKE them the best years of your life. Life doesn't owe you happiness. Life isn't fair. No one is concerned about your happiness or your fulfillment. Those are up to you."
She was miserable because she thought she was owed something. How many of us have bad attitudes because we think we are owed things in life? We think our job should pay us more, and we aren't getting what we deserve. We think our friends should call more, and we get upset at them when they don't. We think that our spouse should buy us more things, or should do things like Mr Superhusband or Mrs Superwife down the street.
We need to lose the entitlement mentality. It's killing our attitudes.
Step 4. CHOOSE your attitude.
You are in control of your attitude. No one else is. If you want to see an example of a fantastic attitude, watch this short video about Patrick Hughes. I challenge you to watch this and change your attitude towards life to be more like this amazing young man.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-qTiYA1WiY8
A bad attitude is like a flat tire- you can't go anywhere until you change it.
"You were taught, in regard to your former way of life, to put off the old self which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires, to be made new in the attitude of your minds, and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness." Ephesians 4:22-24
It will even determine your feelings towards God and the church.
If you follow these four steps, you will be amazed at how quickly your life will change- simply because you have changed your attitude.
Remember: a bad attitude is like a flat tire. You can't go anywhere until you change it.
Step 1: Realize that you always see everything you WANT to see.
Jim went to church. During the prelude, he heard the organist miss a note and he winced. During the time where the congregation was supposed to kneel in prayer, he heard a teenager talking and he got his feathers ruffled. During the offering, he thought he saw an usher checking out what he put in the plate, and it made his blood boil. During the sermon, he heard the pastor make five grammatical mistakes. As he was leaving, he said, "What a bunch of incompetent morons and hypocrites! I'm never going there again!"
Don also went to church. During the prelude, he was amazed at the majesty of the organist playing "A Mighty Fortress is Our God." During the time of prayer, he heard a teenager sharing her testimony with an older woman sitting next to her. He was pleased to see Christians giving sacrificially to meet community needs during the offering. The sermon answered a question he had been asking for a long time. As he left, he said, "How can someone come in here and not experience the power and majesty of God?"
The interesting part? Both men attended the same church service. Both saw exactly what they wanted to see.
How about you? If you are looking for reasons that life is awful, you're certain to find them. If you are looking for reasons to see that things are great, you will find them too. Just realize that in life, you are seeing exactly what you want to see, and your attitude is allowing you to see things that are good or things that are awful.
Step 2: Establish wide margins regarding toxic people.
Some people are toxic. Sometimes you can get rid of them- you can unfriend them on Facebook, refuse to hang out with them, etc. Other times, you can't get rid of them- you share the same house, office, school, etc with them. If you can't get away from them, set up boundaries between you and them, allowing them little to no influence on you, because they will certainly kill your attitude. The five types of toxic people (that I can identify in the Bible) are:
1) The Perpetual Victim. This is the person whose actions have completely destroyed his or her life, and yet continues to blame everyone but himself. He dates the wrong person, gets his heart broken, blames God (or others) and then next week does the same thing. He spends money like a drunken sailor and then blames "the system" or "the man" for his poverty. He never sees anything as his own fault and is constantly making excuses. Establish wide boundaries around this kind of person, because his self-destruction is coming fast.
2) The Ventilator. This is the person who shows his annoyance at anything and everything. He flies off the handle at the slightest thing. He has no gravity, no maturity, and enjoys spouting his opinions; moving into belligerent territory when his opinion is crossed. This person never stops to consider his words or his tone, and rarely if ever lets something go or drops the matter. Drama doesn't just follow this person; it literally inhabits him. Establish wide boundaries around this kind of person, because you will become like him if you don't.
3) The Black Hole. This is the person who has the ability to suck the life, joy, and happiness out of any person within a four-hundred yard radius. They constantly point out what is wrong with each and every situation, focusing on the hopelessness of life. They are needy, whiny, and overly dramatic people. Eeyore looks cheerful compared to these people. They tend to criticize anything that seems good, explaining how awful it probably is. However, the worst thing that The Black Hole person does is to criticize dreams, visions, and goals of others, trying to defeat them before they start. If you see this person coming towards you, run.
4) The Mocker/Scoffer. Perhaps the most toxic of all people you will ever encounter is the Mocker/Scoffer. This is a person who is incredibly insecure who tries to pass himself off as intelligent and bright by mocking others. They scoff at anything they disagree with, descending into personal attacks on character. They try to pass themselves off as experts, but in the end, all they do is destroy. They are excellent at insults, gloating, making fun, and stabbing in the back. If you have one of these people in your life, move as far away from them as you can, because they are perhaps the most toxic person of all. They will literally kill your attitude.
5) The Busybody. This is the person with no concept of boundaries at all. They see no difference between your business and their business, and they constantly involve themselves in things that are none of their concern. These are the gossips of the town. Interesting enough, these people are usually tired, exhausted, and stressed, because involving themselves in others' lives wears them out. They are constantly finding out information and slanting it to make it the best story possible. Always remember the golden rule of gossiping: Whoever is gossiping TO you is also gossiping ABOUT you, so keep a wide boundary between you and them.
Step 3. Lose the entitlement mentality.
Nothing kills your attitude faster than the feeling that you aren't getting something you deserve.
I was in youth ministry many years ago, and a high school girl in our ministry came up to me to talk.
She said, "I'm not happy." Big surprise. This girl was NEVER happy.
She continued, "These are supposed to be the best years of my life, and I'm just miserable."
I asked her, "What are you doing to make these the best years of your life?" She looked stunned. She apparently thought that once you were in high school, people lined up to make your day for you. I continued, "You're miserable because you think life owes you something. News flash- life owes you NOTHING."
"You've been given an amazing gift called life. You want these to be the best years of your life? Go out and MAKE them the best years of your life. Life doesn't owe you happiness. Life isn't fair. No one is concerned about your happiness or your fulfillment. Those are up to you."
She was miserable because she thought she was owed something. How many of us have bad attitudes because we think we are owed things in life? We think our job should pay us more, and we aren't getting what we deserve. We think our friends should call more, and we get upset at them when they don't. We think that our spouse should buy us more things, or should do things like Mr Superhusband or Mrs Superwife down the street.
We need to lose the entitlement mentality. It's killing our attitudes.
Step 4. CHOOSE your attitude.
You are in control of your attitude. No one else is. If you want to see an example of a fantastic attitude, watch this short video about Patrick Hughes. I challenge you to watch this and change your attitude towards life to be more like this amazing young man.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-qTiYA1WiY8
A bad attitude is like a flat tire- you can't go anywhere until you change it.
"You were taught, in regard to your former way of life, to put off the old self which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires, to be made new in the attitude of your minds, and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness." Ephesians 4:22-24
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