When I was a senior in college, I was engaged to my then-fiancee-now-wife. I was a twenty-one-year-old guy on a college campus (my future wife attended a different university, so we only saw each other on weekends).
During the fall semester, I played soccer, which meant that many weekends we would have road trip games. The women's soccer team also travelled with us. We would leave Friday nights, stay in hotels, play a game Saturday, travel to the next college, stay in a hotel, and play Sunday. Then we would road trip back to our school Sunday evening.
Needless to say, that put twenty in-shape, young guys in close proximity with twenty in-shape, young ladies. All weekend. When we were not playing matches, there was a lot of down time. Hanging out in hotel rooms. Lounging by the pool. You get what I am saying.
I was excited about being married. I was madly in love with my fiancee, who is now my wife, and I still am today. However, that environment was tailor-made for temptation, and I'll admit, there were times that I struggled. Nothing physical was ever going to happen, but at times it was tempting to look. It was in one of those moments that God spoke to me and told me something I will never forget.
We were in San Antonio, getting ready to play Trinity University. The women's team was playing first, and we were sitting on the sideline as they ran by us onto the field for warm-ups. Some of the guys made some remarks about the physiques of some of the ladies, and as I looked to see who they were referring to, God spoke to me. He said three words.
"That's not yours."
Three words that completely took me off guard. He didn't have to say anything else.
What God was saying was that He had created those young women. I believe that I was created for my wife and she was created for me. Therefore, those young women belonged to someone else. They belonged to the men who some day would marry them and call them their wives, just as those men whom they would call husband belonged to them.
God created them precious and attractive so that their future husbands would be blessed, just as God created their future husbands handsome and attractive so they would be blessed. What God had created was sacred and more importantly, off-limits to everyone except for whom they were intended.
To all you men out there, and you ladies out there, that struggle with lust, I want you to repeat those same words God spoke to me- "That's not yours." That lady that you work with? That's not yours. That woman or teen girl on the website you frequent? That's not yours. The wife of your best friend that you enjoy flirting with? That's not yours.
Do you see how awful it is to lust over something that isn't yours? Do you see the sin that is being committed? That's not yours. Stop treating it like it is. Stop treating HER like she is.
She's not yours. She was made for someone other than you. So hands off. Eyes off. Thoughts off. THAT'S NOT YOURS.
If you face sexual temptation, if you face the temptation to look at women (or men) in a sexual way, call these three words to mind- "That's not yours." These three words have kept me from all kinds of trouble- all kinds of temptation have been defeated by those three words. All kinds of marital strife and trouble have been avoided because of those three words. All kinds of embarrassment and betrayal have been defeated because of those three words.
Maybe you men need to write these three words on a post-it note and stick it on your computer.
Maybe you men need to change the name of the contact in your phone, you know, the one that you can't delete because you work with her or something, but you get very excited when she calls, to "That's not yours."
Keep your hands and eyes off of God's people. They're not yours.
During the fall semester, I played soccer, which meant that many weekends we would have road trip games. The women's soccer team also travelled with us. We would leave Friday nights, stay in hotels, play a game Saturday, travel to the next college, stay in a hotel, and play Sunday. Then we would road trip back to our school Sunday evening.
Needless to say, that put twenty in-shape, young guys in close proximity with twenty in-shape, young ladies. All weekend. When we were not playing matches, there was a lot of down time. Hanging out in hotel rooms. Lounging by the pool. You get what I am saying.
I was excited about being married. I was madly in love with my fiancee, who is now my wife, and I still am today. However, that environment was tailor-made for temptation, and I'll admit, there were times that I struggled. Nothing physical was ever going to happen, but at times it was tempting to look. It was in one of those moments that God spoke to me and told me something I will never forget.
We were in San Antonio, getting ready to play Trinity University. The women's team was playing first, and we were sitting on the sideline as they ran by us onto the field for warm-ups. Some of the guys made some remarks about the physiques of some of the ladies, and as I looked to see who they were referring to, God spoke to me. He said three words.
"That's not yours."
Three words that completely took me off guard. He didn't have to say anything else.
What God was saying was that He had created those young women. I believe that I was created for my wife and she was created for me. Therefore, those young women belonged to someone else. They belonged to the men who some day would marry them and call them their wives, just as those men whom they would call husband belonged to them.
God created them precious and attractive so that their future husbands would be blessed, just as God created their future husbands handsome and attractive so they would be blessed. What God had created was sacred and more importantly, off-limits to everyone except for whom they were intended.
To all you men out there, and you ladies out there, that struggle with lust, I want you to repeat those same words God spoke to me- "That's not yours." That lady that you work with? That's not yours. That woman or teen girl on the website you frequent? That's not yours. The wife of your best friend that you enjoy flirting with? That's not yours.
Do you see how awful it is to lust over something that isn't yours? Do you see the sin that is being committed? That's not yours. Stop treating it like it is. Stop treating HER like she is.
She's not yours. She was made for someone other than you. So hands off. Eyes off. Thoughts off. THAT'S NOT YOURS.
If you face sexual temptation, if you face the temptation to look at women (or men) in a sexual way, call these three words to mind- "That's not yours." These three words have kept me from all kinds of trouble- all kinds of temptation have been defeated by those three words. All kinds of marital strife and trouble have been avoided because of those three words. All kinds of embarrassment and betrayal have been defeated because of those three words.
Maybe you men need to write these three words on a post-it note and stick it on your computer.
Maybe you men need to change the name of the contact in your phone, you know, the one that you can't delete because you work with her or something, but you get very excited when she calls, to "That's not yours."
Keep your hands and eyes off of God's people. They're not yours.
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